The Power of Lace: Perhaps She Would Have Worn These…
Article by Katrina Eugenia
Photography by Katrina Eugenia, inspired by Marilyn Monroe & Bert Stern
Fabric Flowers by Julie Mollo
Panties by Knock Out Smart Panties
“I went out shopping with Amy and wore a tight sweater that put an expression on her mouth like she was sucking a small rock- ‘the convent look’ I came to call it- and I wore large sunglasses. She took me to Saks and Bonwit Teller’s and people lined up to look at us as soon as I got spotted. Women were ripping open the curtain in the dressing room, which was enough to do Amy in, if she hadn’t been made of the toughest stuff. First, she discovered I wear no panties, and to make it worse, a bit of my natural odor came off with the removal of the skirt. Nothing drives people crazier than a woman with an aroma that doesn’t come out of a bottle. Maybe I should use deodorant, but I do like a little sniff of myself. It’s a way of staying in touch. ‘Oh, God,’ the Abe in me can say to the Bob, ‘you’re really rank today.’
“Anyway. Amy turned her head at the sight of my pubic hair which is, alas, disconcertingly dark, and then the curtains flew open, and shoppers gawked, three big mouths and three big noses, and a tall skinny salesman came over to shut the curtains and croaked, ‘Miss Monroe!’ and disappeared forever. I had to laugh. I knew I’d changed his life. I think sometimes, that’s why I do it.”
-From Of Women And Their Elegance by Norman Mailer
I was once required to do a reading at a dinner party from any one of Norman Mailer’s 40 books. Days before the dinner, I began to cry and insisted to my boyfriend, Buffalo, that I could not do it. “I can barely read to myself!” I whined, “How am I going to read out loud?! I sound out every word!” But Buffalo had faith, and insisted that with a little practice, I could pull it off.
Over the next couple of days, sweating bullets all the while, Buffalo coached me on reading my favorite scene from Of Women And Their Elegance, a book his father, Norman, wrote from what he imagined was the perspective of Marilyn Monroe. After endless practice, I still sounded like I was in the 2nd grade reading circle, resulting in the decision that I should instead memorize the scene and sneakily look down at the book to appear like I was indeed actually reading it. My trophy of a boyfriend gave me my first acting lesson, and I memorized my monologue for the dinner party.
“While I respect Ms. Monroe’s feelings on embracing the breeze as it were, I can’t help but think Marilyn would have worn these.”
Truth be told, I was still scared out of my mind that night, and “read” my little paragraphs at the speed of light, without even taking a breath in between sentences. But the bottom line is, that monologue was embedded in my brain forevermore. And like Marilyn, I am guilty as charged, for I too often go without panties. However, something about Knock Out’s Smart Panties makes me feel great, and regardless of their nerdy technology, they look so cute when I put them on! While I respect Ms. Monroe’s feelings on embracing the breeze as it were, I can’t help but think Marilyn would have worn these.
Whether you are going back to school, or back to work, Knock Out’s Smart Panties has a pair for you. Engineered to absorb odor, and lined with 100% cotton, they are dye-free, with breathable fabric containing fibers that quickly dry excess girlie juices. It is no wonder Harvard tipped their hat to these innovative lacy wonders, awarding Knock Out first place in the Harvard Business New Venture Contest for 2012 (ironically where Norman Mailer, his son Michael Mailer, and his nephew Peter Alson went to school, as did the CEO of Knock Out, Angela Newnam).
Another Harvard alumni from the Mailer clan, Norman’s sister, Barbara Wasserman (aka Aunt Barbara), and I often bond over panties and the art of finding bras and swimwear that fit our similar hour glass figures. Recently, she mentioned how she disliked the elastic band on panties that cut into her figure. She was thankful when the lace elastic band was invented. From one curvy girl to another, we shared compassion over the matter, and in the back of my mind, I just knew I had to introduce her to Knock Out’s Smart Panties.
The next day I brought her a pair of Knock Out’s high waisted lace panties. At dinner that evening, she looked at me with a grin on her face and said, “I’m wearing them.”
“So,” I asked, “how do you like?”
“You can tell them even an 85 year old woman can wear these!”